Your generous
donations help keep
this site running.
Visa/MC/PayPal accepted.
As always, we like to start out the new year in amusing fashion, as we salute the tireless pedants way up north at the Lake Superior State University who, each year, determine which words and phrases have been so overused and are so annoying that they deserve banishment from the vernacular.
Speaking as someone who generally enjoys a good conspiracy theory just for the "creative writing" aspect alone, in all good conscience I simply must report this shocking news: I have uncovered a big, fat conspiracy that is no mere theory. We're either being lied to, or we're joining in the propagation of the lie ourselves, with merriment. In actual fact, it would not be hyperbole to call this the father of all conspiracies.
A U.S. military website showing Santa Claus delivering his presents while guarded by warplanes has some children's advocates worried.
In a twist to its tradition of tracking an animated version of Santa Claus' sleigh and reindeer as he flies around the globe on December 24, the military is adding the animated fighter plane escort to give a realistic feel to the popular feature, said a spokesman for the North American Aerospace Defense Command.
Welcome back to the second of our year-end awards columns! And if you missed it last Friday, go check out [Part 1] as well.
This article is mind-bendingly long enough, so we're not going to bother with any other introductory words at all. Instead, let's just get right to the awards, shall we?
Welcome to our annual year-end awards! As always, we honor the memory of The McLaughlin show with our categories, and we want to thank the readers who responded to our calls for nominees for them all.
Also as always, it is long. Really, really, insanely long. You have been warned!
And also as always, we'll be back again next Friday for [Part 2].
I must begin with an apology, because once again I find that I cannot bring myself to write a new Hallowe'en column this year.
Usually, at this time of year, I try to come up with frightful tales of horror for both the left and right sides of the political divide -- which I attempt to make both humorous and also so far-fetched that they're ridiculously unbelievable. The "scare factor" is tempered by the "Oh, that could never actually happen" factor, to put it another way.
These are indeed scary times we live in. And it would be impossible for me to try to construct a nightmarish scenario for those on the left that is any more frightful than what we are living through now.
Tomorrow could be the biggest day of mass protest America has ever experienced. The "No Kings" rallies planned for Saturday could, collectively, add up to more than the five million who turned out earlier this year for the same reason: to protest that America was founded on the idea that we do not want to be ruled by a king who holds himself above the law, but instead by laws that all people -- even the country's highest leaders -- have to follow. That's a pretty basic premise, really. And the organizers of the rallies have reportedly gotten a much larger signup than occurred at their earlier rally, so the signs are pointing to tomorrow breaking records as well. There will be over 2,500 locations of these rallies across all 50 states, so go to their site and check out where the closest one to you is!
On the National Mall, with the United States Capitol as a backdrop, democracy is dying. Or... well... melting, to be more pedantic and less poetic. A brilliant art installation funded by Ben Cohen (of "Ben and Jerry's" fame) was erected this morning and unveiled at noon, consisting of an ice sculpture spelling out "DEMOCRACY" in capital letters five feet high. They lucked out on the day chosen, since it is reportedly a sunny 70 degrees in Washington today, which means the sculpture is not going to last very much longer (there's a live feed of it available, which at roughly 5:00 P.M. Washington time had been reduced to the "D", the first "C", and the "Y", with a portion of the second "C" and nubs of a few other letters still hanging on). The message is as simple as it is brilliant: Democracy is melting away before our very eyes. Or, to rework the now-laughable banner slogan of the once-vaunted Washington Post: "DEMOCRACY" dies in broad daylight.
The United States of America now seems to have officially become a banana republic. That's really the only conclusion one can draw, after the events of the past week (and the past eight months, for good measure).
Last night, Jimmy Kimmel returned to the airwaves. Well, most of them, at any rate. Two corporate conglomerates of ABC affiliates refused to air the show, but with modern technology available, everyone can now watch his opening monologue even if you live in a television market where his show was pre-empted.
The official YouTube video of the opening of Jimmy Kimmel Live! has (as of this writing) 15.7 million views. If you haven't seen it yet, it is well worth watching. In fact, today we are pre-empting our own political column to present a full transcript of what Jimmy had to say last night in his opening monologue, because it is an important statement on free speech that stands on its own, and one that everyone who cares about free speech should either read or watch.