If anyone needed any further proof that everything that Donald Trump touches turns to schlock (or worse), this week's opening of the Great American State Fair certainly provided some. The initial idea wasn't too bad a concept -- have all 50 states send an exhibit to the National Mall, and it would capture the spirit of state fairs held every year across America. Sounds kind of fun, actually.

But, of course, with Trump in charge of it, things didn't turn out as well as they could have. And that's putting it mildly. The whole thing was supposed to kick off with a big concert, but when the musical artists realized it was a pro-Trump event (rather than a nonpartisan celebration of patriotism), almost all of them immediately pulled out. So Trump, in a hissy fit, said that he'd give a speech instead, with the handful of the few musical artists still willing to perform for him also featured.

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It is with a very heavy heart that I sit down to write this column today. This is going to be about my personal experiences and emotions, not about anything happening in the headlines right now, just to warn everyone in advance.

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It's pretty easy to see who won Donald Trump's war of choice with Iran -- and who lost. All you have to do is look at the deal both sides just signed, which is obviously heavily tilted in Iran's favor. In fact, it is pretty much impossible to claim otherwise -- to claim that somehow the U.S. won a resounding victory and forced a defeated foe to the bargaining table, where the U.S. would dictate terms of the surrender. In fact, it looks a lot more like exactly the opposite happened.

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The reviews are starting to come in, and they're... not good. Not good at all. Donald Trump's "Memorandum Of Understanding" with Iran is not exactly a big hit with anyone, it seems. The emerging consensus is that Trump pretty much threw away any advantage we had gained over the course of his war of choice, while giving the Iranians pretty much everything they had been asking for.

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We start today with some good news, for a change. The first is time-sensitive, so check it out now -- a livestream of workers removing Donald Trump's name from the outside wall of what will once again be known as simply The John F. Kennedy Memorial Center For The Performing Arts. As of this writing, the scaffolding has been set up, but nobody's on top of it and Trump's name still appears. By judicial order, Trump's name must be removed today, so take a look, maybe you'll get to see them prying letters off the building! They've already removed the odious new name from their website, but removing it from the building will be more satisfying to see.

The second piece of good news is more momentous. Are you sitting down? For once, Donald Trump apparently was not lying about a deal to end his Iran war of choice being finalized. No, really! CNN recently tallied it up and found that, previous to the last few days, Trump had lied about it a whopping 38 times, so it is definitely shocking that this time around the blind pig actually found an acorn!

We supposed we shouldn't be so snarky about something as serious as the end of a war, but after 38 times, we had to express our amazement (and frustration) somehow.

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We are now well into the primary election season, so it's time to take a look at the biggest burning question Democrats have at the moment: will they be able to ride a blue wave in November that is big enough to flip control of the U.S. Senate, or is this merely starry-eyed optimism run amok?

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Donald Trump's war of choice with Iran ground to a stalemate this week, and it doesn't seem like progress will be made any time soon. One week ago, Iran announced (as a goodwill gesture, most likely) that the Strait of Hormuz was open once again. Trump then made a slew of sweeping announcements of his own (as a bad-will gesture) and refused to drop his blockade of Iranian ports.

Trump is attempting to define the war the way he usually does, by gaslighting and openly lying, in the hopes that everyone will start believing his lies rather than paying attention to reality. Or just by constantly contradicting himself, showing he doesn't really have a clue as to what is really going on. The Iranians, however, aren't playing his game. They responded with a withering: "The President of the United States made seven claims in one hour, all seven of which were false. They did not win the war with these lies, and they will certainly not get anywhere in negotiations either." Iran then promptly closed the Strait back down and attacked two ships (to show they were serious). So the U.S. attacked an Iranian ship and seized it by force. The Iranians responded by seizing a few ships by force in the Strait.

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Welcome back to TACO Tuesday! Once again, "Trump Always Chickens Out" rules the day....

I shouldn't be so snarky, I suppose. Because in this case, Donald Trump chickening out is a very good thing indeed. As the world waited with baited breath to see whether the two-week ceasefire between Iran and the United States was going to end without a deal being reached between the two countries -- which would have assumably meant Trump making good on his threats to bomb every power plant and bridge in Iran -- Trump put out the following message:

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I think my zone is now officially flooded.

I don't quite know how else to put it, really. Trying to keep up with political events when every headline seems like it could be just as easily have read "More Chaos Ensues" is a downright daunting task. Donald Trump's "flood the zone" strategy is tough enough to keep up with as it is, but at this point it is almost impossible to comment intelligently about any of the most impactful stories of the day because of the constant contradictions and incoherence emanating from the White House.

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Last week, Donald Trump threatened to wipe out "a whole civilization" which has been around for thousands of years. This week, he not only picked a fight with the Pope, but for good measure also posted a picture of himself depicted as Jesus Christ. That Nobel Peace Prize should be a cinch for him now, right?

The best commentary we heard about all of this came from Representative Sydney Kamlager-Dove, a Democrat from California. As an aside in an eye-opening comment she made to a reporter (more on this in a bit), she called Trump, "this dude, Dr. Jesus...." Which is where our headline today came from (to give credit where it is due).

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