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[From The Archives] Craig Ferguson's Excellent Rant -- "If You Don't Vote, You're A Moron."

[ Posted Tuesday, November 6th, 2018 – 15:04 PST ]

I miss Craig Ferguson on late-night television. I freely admit my own bias here, because watching Craig at night was always a surreal trip into the mindset of someone who obviously just didn't give a rat's ass about what anyone else thought, at all. Craig would say whatever was on his mind, completely undiluted. Watching him helped me to recover from all the political nonsense of the day, so I could sleep better at night.

So rather than sit down today and write out a "Get out there and VOTE!" column, I thought I'd re-run a column I wrote ten years ago. This was the first time I ever saw Ferguson, and when I did my jaw hit the floor. People (at least, back then) just didn't say stuff like this on television, no matter how late the hour. I was so enthralled by Craig's rant that I sat down and transcribed it the next day. It remains the best "get out and vote" rant I've ever seen, so while the political references are dated (this was during the McCain/Obama race), the sentiments are not.

One technical change I have to make, though. The link I provide within the column is now dead. However, the clip still lives on YouTube, so if you've never seen this before, check out both part one and part two of Craig's rant (there was a commercial break in between the two). You won't be sorry you did, I promise.

Oh, and, of course, GET OUT AND VOTE!

 

[Originally published September 11, 2008]

As a public service, today I am running a full transcript of Craig Ferguson's monologue (from The Late Late Show on CBS) from last night, 8/10/08.

I tuned in to David Letterman last night to see Barack Obama's interview, and happened to catch Ferguson as he went on an absolute rant worthy of the name. I was pretty happy watching the Obama interview, but this just stunned me. Craig Ferguson is an extremely funny comedian who usually plays a cheerful idiot on his show, and this isn't the usual fare for him. But he nailed it.

I looked for a full transcription of his remarks but could not find them anywhere online today, so I decided to post my own. You can watch both these segments from Aaron Barnhart's blog, as he's got the two YouTube segments posted together (he also has an edited transcript, but it cuts a lot out).

So without further ado, here is Craig Ferguson (a recently naturalized American citizen), from last night's show:

 

It's a great day for America, everybody. Why? Well, um... it just is. And... I just... did you... did you just watch Barack Obama on David Letterman? I did... 'cause this show is live. I was just watching it... I watched that show... now I don't want to... to say who I... I support, in this election, but when I'm watching that show, I'm thinking: "Now, there's a very sexy, compassionate man." Obama is good too, but Dave... not only sexy... my boss. Find new and creative ways to suck up to people, that's what I always do.

But I'm watching him on Dave, and the presidential election is heating up. There's all sorts of "controversy." You know, 'cause Obama's been saying, "You can put a pig..." ah... put a pig... you can put a pig anywhere you like -- it's America! Put a pig over here! Are you sure? Yeah! You wouldn't be able to do that in Soviet Russia. You have to keep your pig in a commune with other pigs, but, in America, pigs roam free! Obama is, ah, said "You can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig" and then Republicans are like: [sharp intake of breath]"Did you call Sarah Palin a pig?!? That means you hate America!!" And then the Democrats will say, "No, no, no!! Republicans -- you don't love pigs! It's a pig's right to wear lipstick.. this is... free.. surely," blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, [mimes sticking finger down throat] bleah!

What I don't understand... what I don't understand is this: What... Why is Barack Obama talking about lipstick on a pig? Why are we talking about animals and cosmetics? Here's... Here's another thing I don't understand: Why is John McCain hanging around while his vice presidential candidate is up there... you know... campaigning to be president? What the hell's going on? He's like: "[unintelligible "old man" noises] Idn't she pretty?"

If you watch the news you would think that Sarah Palin is running for president.

Spoiler alert! You're not!

What happens is that the media... really, me too... yeah, I count... the media focuses on the best-looking candidates from either side -- the most "TV-friendly" people. The TV news reports, you know, like the way this election is being covered... is being covered is like TMZ or something. It's like they're covering Paris and Nicole. I... I'm watching this... it's like: "Ooh, [moron noises], look at her hair and hat," and everything, and I'm like: if... if Walter Cronkite could see these brain-dead morons yapping about flag pins and hairstyles, he'd turn over in his grave! Which is weird because Cronkite is alive and well and he lives in Martha's Vineyard. But, if he were dead, he'd be furious!

Do you know what I think it is? I think a lot of the reporters want to be as famous as the candidates they're covering. And here is my hope for this election. Anyways, my belief and my hope... that the American people are smarter than the media that are meant to be serving them. At this time... this is unbelievable to me. I think people want to see real solutions to real problems -- and they don't really care that much if they come from the right or the left. You know, every media outlet, you know, wants you to pay attention to their agenda, and their poll. But there's only one poll that matters, and it's on November the fourth. [asks offstage] (It's November the fourth, right?) Yeah, November the fourth!

I should say... you know what I... you know the other thing about, you know, when they... they... when the news reports show the candidates in slow motion with their families? And "the children," you know? I don't care! They show that the candidate... and the candidates say: "well, the family is off limits," you know, I mean, like Sarah Palin says, you know, "my daughter's pregnancy, that's off limits, that's a family matter;" and Barack Obama is saying "yes, that's absolutely right" -- but listen, here's what I say: if your families are off limits, WHY ARE THEY ON THE STAGE? Why is there a profile in People magazine of you and your damn family all over -- the children marching around -- SHAME ON YOU, YOU MANIPULATIVE HYPOCRITES!!

I'm talking to both sides. Talking about... Obama... McCain... Palin... the other one... I'm talking to all of you!

I like all... I like all four of these candidates a lot -- for comedy reasons they can't be beat. You got your, your grizzled old veteran who's trying to win one last campaign. You got the brash rookie who inspires millions. You got that hockey mom who's governor by day, naughty librarian by night. You've got, ah, Biden, who's all "Biden-ey" there.

What... the point I'm trying to get is this is a very important election, this one, but you would not know it from the way it's being reported. You know, politics is covered like show business now. On The Today Show, you know, this morning, they're like: "Which candidate would you rather have dinner with?" Here's an easy answer: None! They're politicians! I don't want dinner with you... I don't want your friendship! Here's what I want to know: What are you going to do for this country, pal? What are you gonna do?!?

[in a singsong voice, dancing around] My children... oh, ho! [points to back of head] Do I have a zipper up here or something?!?

The news reports, they're all very tabloid-ey, they're trying to be funny, like... like Jon Stewart... you know, maybe because more and more people, see, they're getting their news from late-night TV -- which, believe me -- not a good idea. I like... I like The Daily Show. I like Jon Stewart, I think he does a bang-up job, he does a great job... but let him do it -- the rest of the TV news people, TAKE THIS THING SERIOUSLY!! This is important!!

And listen, we all visit -- you too... you too ladies... gentleman and ladies, we've got, we, all of us, we've got a responsibility... you have to get your news from... from news sources, not just one, 'cause they're all biased. Especially the cable channels... MSNBC, very liberal... Fox News, very conservative... the Animal Planet, always meerkats, never badgers....

Do you know what... Do you know what bothers me is that every election year as well, you get the voter registration drives aimed at the young people: "Rock the Vote"... "The Vote's Crack-a-lackin"... "Think the Vote"... you know... "Music the Vote"... "Dee-de-dee-de"... here... "The Vote, The Vote, The Vote, The Vote, The Vote, The Vote, The Vote!"

Are we so lost we have to be sold our own democratic right? What the hell is wrong with... what is going on?!? We have to "sexy-up" the vote for young people? Remember four years ago Puff Diddley had that group "Vote or Die"? Then it turns out he didn't even vote himself! Maybe he forgot which name he registered under.

Listen. Here's what I am saying to you... here's what I'm saying. Here's what I've been saying: If you don't vote, you're a moron. Alright?

If you... settle down. I know you say: "Well, not voting is a vote" -- no it isn't! Not voting is... is just being stupid. Voting is not sexy. Voting is not hip. It is not fashionable. It's not a movie. It's not a videogame. All the kids hate doing it. Frankly, voting is a pain in the ass, but here's a word -- look it up -- it is your duty to vote! "Duty?"

The foundation in this democracy is based on free people making free choices. So, young people, if you can't take your hand out of your bag of Cheetos long enough to fill out a form, then you can't complain when we wind up with President Sanjaya!

Listen. I am an American. This country at... is at war -- right now. Americans, in foreign lands, wearing uniforms representing this country, are losing their lives. Americans here in this country are losing their homes. We have two patriotic candidates, right? They both love this country. They have different ideas about what to do with it. Learn about them. Read about them. Question them. Listen to them. Then, on Election Day, exercise your sacred right as American, and listen to yourself.

We'll be right back.

 

[Commercial break]

 

Welcome back, everybody! Welcome back. Welcome back to the grumpy political edition of the show. I'm angry! Oh, I-I-I-I... yeah!

Do you know, I'm thinking about the, ah... I was... I got these statistics off the Googley web today, and I'm... I was looking at the statistics of people who... who actually vote, and I'm thinking, and I'll get to this in a minute... but I'm thinking, I think a lot of people don't vote because they think they're going to have to get into an argument about... you know... they have to talk to other people about, you know, who they are voting for, and get into the political discussion, and tempers flare, and people say mean things, and all that bull doo-doo that you... and all that stuff about... and I think that... I think sometimes people forget this. Um, you don't have to tell anybody who you vote for. Privacy is protected in a democracy like this. You don't... you don't have to tell, ah, who you're voting for. It's none of... It's nobody else's business.

In fact, I wish a lot of people -- celebrities, mostly -- would take advantage of the rule of privacy, and shut the hell up about who you're voting for. And just vote. Just vote. I mean, it's, it's, it's... it's so odd to me, you know... "Well, you should vote the way I am voting, because, you know, I'm on a sitcom." No!! No, it doesn't matter. You... you're perfectly entitled to talk about who you vote for, of course you are, it's encouraged -- but, it's also... you know, you don't have to. I'm just saying.

Anyway, [reads off paper] here in the past two presidential elections less than two-thirds of the eligible voters turned out to the polls -- 64% in 2004, and 60%... 60%... in 2000. [asks offstage] What is that, a "B"? That's a "B," isn't it? "D"? A "D"? A "D" isn't sixty... where the hell did you go to school? A "D" at 60%? Really, is that a "D"... is it really? [audience: "Yeah!"] Man, I'm really glad I dropped out of high school, that would have sucked!

Um. Ah, let's see... historically, if you register to vote, you're more likely to vote. Here's one thing I was ashamed, ah, I was ashamed of this... naturalized citizens [points to self]... naturalized citizens, they vote less frequently than Americans born here. What the hell are you thinking?

Ahh... young adults always have the lowest percentage of any group... um, yeah, it's always... it's... you're 57% in 2004 for 18-to-24 year olds... fifty-seven... [asks offstage] that's a "D-minus?" "F"? My god, you guys are tough!

More women vote... more veterans vote... the highest voter percentage is Minnesota, Wisconsin, Oregon, Maine, New Hampshire, North Dakota and Iowa -- no surprises there.

Here's the thing that made me think, though, the... the people who didn't register to vote, when they were asked why they didn't vote, they said, ah... half of them said, "I'm not interested in the election," and the other half said, "I'm not interested in politics."

How could you be not interested in politics? You've got, you've got to have an opinion about something. Don't you think? I mean, I don't know -- "I'm not interested in politics" -- do you, do you live anywhere? Do you, do you shop anywhere? Do you drive a car? Do you put on pants? Do you leave the house at any point? Do you own the house? Do you rent the house? Do you ever, ah, hope that the police will save you from something that may or may not be illegal? Of course you're involved in politics. If you're alive you're involved in politics.

Anyway, I thought we'd bring out... no, no... no, please... I thought I would bring out something of which I am, ah, about to fill in, which I thought you might be... and all of you, in the studio audience, ah, the thousands of people that make up the studio audience every night here... These will be available to you as you leave the studio tonight, and, ah, they're available in libraries and post offices in... ah... in supermarkets, sometimes. And I got mine... it's, ah... it's a voter registration form, and all you do is... it's kind of your IQ test to see if you can vote. All you have to do is fill in some pretty tough questions... name, address... when you were born... telephone (if you have a telephone, you don't have to put telephone in)... I know, it's pretty, uh, pretty relaxed. You, ah, don't have to put in, ah... oh, you can put... "I decline to state a political party." I would do that if I was you, and you know why? Just to be ornery And then you just sign it and you send it away, and you get to participate in... ah... in the democracy... ah... that we live in.

[holds outside of form up to camera] Take that, stamp collector! [camera zooms in on "No postage necessary" on envelope front]

What I'm saying is: please, do me the honor of being my fellow Americans, and vote!

We'll be right back...

-- Chris Weigant

 

Follow Chris on Twitter: @ChrisWeigant

 

58 Comments on “[From The Archives] Craig Ferguson's Excellent Rant -- "If You Don't Vote, You're A Moron."”

  1. [1] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Program Note:

    Later on today, as the returns start coming in, I'll be here in the comments live-blogging as they come in. I invite everyone to join me for what looks to be a long night...

    :-)

    -CW

  2. [2] 
    TheStig wrote:

    CW-

    I have made a vow not to obsess over incomplete returns trickling in. I'll turn on the TV around 11:30 pm and will have a look on line about 7am Wed. In between I'll watch a movie and or read a book and hopefully get some high quality sleep. :)

    Love the CF re-rant.

  3. [3] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    Great post CW! I miss Craig as well! I did catch his stand up on Netflix a couple times of months ago, and it felt like being reunited with an old friend.

  4. [4] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    OK, here we go!

    TheStig [2] -

    Nice coinage of "re-rant" there... just had to say that.

    My tweet for this article began with:

    "Where have you gone @CraigyFerg -u-son / Our nation turns its lonely eyes to you / Woo woo woo"

    Heh. Glad to know I'm not the only one...

    -CW

  5. [5] 
    James T Canuck wrote:

    There's the added bonus of the unrelenting Scottish accent, when the humour dries up.

    LL&P

  6. [6] 
    Kick wrote:

    CW

    Great article!

  7. [7] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE RED -----> BLUE

    1. VA-10

  8. [8] 
    Kick wrote:

    JL

    I thought about you several times today. Why? Let's just say you wouldn't even believe how many pies I took to the polls today... pizza pies.

    Pies to the Polls! :)

  9. [9] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    House races are trickling in...

    Bernie wins re-election! Woo hoo!

    OK, the top of the hour's coming up, so a flood of data should be coming soon.

    -CW

  10. [10] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE RED -----> BLUE

    1. VA-10
    2. FL-27

  11. [11] 
    nypoet22 wrote:

    pizza pies count!

  12. [12] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Dems keep 7 races in Senate, and CBS just called Ohio for Sherrod Brown, making it 8.

    -CW

  13. [13] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    CBS also saying Donna Shalala won...

    -CW

  14. [14] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    PBS saying Menendez squeaks by in NJ.

    -CW

  15. [15] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    KY6 goes GOP. Not a great sign...

    -CW

  16. [16] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    PBS: Donnelly goes down in IN. That's Dems first Senate loss tonight...

    -CW

  17. [17] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    PBS: Blackburn wins in TN.

    -CW

  18. [18] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Manchin wins WV.

    OK, I gotta go vote, so I'll be back later...

    -CW

  19. [19] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 NEEDED

    1. CO-06
    2. FL-27
    3. PA-05
    4. PA-17
    5. VA-10

  20. [20] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. CO-06
    2. FL-27
    3. MN-03
    4. PA-05
    5. PA-17
    6. VA-10

  21. [21] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. CO-06
    2. FL-27
    3. KS-03
    4. MN-03
    5. PA-05
    6. PA-17
    7. VA-10

  22. [22] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. CO-06
    2. FL-27
    3. KS-03
    4. MN-03
    5. NJ-11
    6. PA-05
    7. PA-17
    8. VA-10

  23. [23] 
    Kick wrote:

    Wait, what?

    The Governor of Kansas... not a typo... will be a Democrat.

    Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore. ~ Judy Garland as Dorothy Gale - The Wizard of Oz

  24. [24] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Kick -

    Just got back from exercising the ol' franchise, and the news seems decidedly brighter.

    Dems just lost their 2nd Senate seat (ND), but some have them up by as much as 12 in the House, including one NYC district that was a big pickup.

    Also, KS! (like you said)

    -CW

  25. [25] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    Why, in this day and age, does it take a person 4 hours in line in order to get to vote?

    How do we not check scanners prior to Election Day to make sure they correctly scan the actual ballots being used?

    How can a physical address be required on your I.D. in order to vote when you live on a reservation that does not use physical addresses? When I lived on the Crow Reservation in Montana, if I ordered anything being delivered by Fed-Ex, I had to tell them my address was,

    Turn right at post office, third house on left AFTER the red church.

    Like everyone else on the reservation, I used a P.O. box to get my mail. North Dakota’s ID law intentionally targets Native American voters as well as homeless citizens.

    We talk about how sad it is that so many voters choose NOT to vote — ignoring their civic duty— but too many places have made voting such a chore that it is understandable why people opt out!

    Colorado and Washington state both mail ballots to all voters about two weeks before Election Day, giving voters plenty of time to research candidates and vote. The return envelopes are pre-paid and if you don’t want to mail it back, you can drop them off at any polling place up until the end of Election Day. No long lines, no need to miss work, no waking up early... that this isn’t done in every state is criminal in my opinion!

  26. [26] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. CO-06
    2. FL-27
    3. KS-03
    4. MI-11
    5. MN-03
    6. NJ-11
    7. NY-11
    8. PA-05
    9. PA-06
    10. PA-07
    11. PA-17
    12. TX-32 We flipped it! You're welcome. :)
    13. VA-02
    14. VA-10

  27. [27] 
    Kick wrote:

    CW
    24

    Dang that was fast! Did you really vote? *laughs* *winks*

    We flipped a freaking Texas House seat! ~521 of those are people my car drove to the polls. *big smile*

    Democrats are going to win the House! :)

    Also, KS! (like you said)

    Crazy, right?!

  28. [28] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    Cruz held off Beto it looks like.

  29. [29] 
    Kick wrote:

    Looks like Honey Badger might be taking Scott Walker down.

    Get him Honey Badger. :)

  30. [30] 
    Kick wrote:

    Russ
    28

    Cruz held off Beto it looks like.

    That was expected, but Beto did awesome regardless. :)

  31. [31] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    Kick,

    Yeah, Beto ran an incredible campaign that he and his supporters should feel proud of.

  32. [32] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. AZ-02
    2. CO-06
    3. FL-26
    4. FL-27
    5. IA-01
    6. IL-06
    7. KS-03
    8. MI-11
    9. MN-03
    10. NJ-11
    11. NY-11
    12. NY-19
    13. NY-22
    14. PA-05
    15. PA-06
    16. PA-07
    17. PA-17
    18. TX-07
    19. TX-32 We flipped it! :)
    20. VA-02
    21. VA-07 Dave Brat! Bye, bye
    22. VA-10

  33. [33] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    Kick,

    I am just fuming about my home state of Georgia’s voting problems! I wish someone would gather information to determine which polling stations had the longest waits and why, and how the majority of those voters voted — Republican or Democrat. How many potential votes were lost because voters did not have four hours of time to wait in order to exercise a right that should not take them ten minutes at most?

    Are there not enough voting machines to accommodate the needs of that district? Why do some polling places ALWAYS have long lines and why haven’t they properly addressed the problems faced in these districts?

    Or worse, standing in line for hours only to get to the front and be told that you aren’t eligible for some unknown reason! It is frustrating; it is humiliating!!! Is it any wonder people don’t want to vote?

    It angers me to no end to see what is clearly blatant discrimination taking place in full view of everyone! And there is nothing that we can do to help!

    Man, I picked the wrong week to stop drinking!

  34. [34] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. AZ-02
    2. CO-06
    3. FL-26
    4. FL-27
    5. IA-01
    6. IL-06
    7. KS-03
    8. MI-11
    9. MN-03
    10. NJ-02
    11. NJ-11
    12. NY-11
    13. NY-19
    14. NY-22
    15. OK-05 Oklahoma!? Insanity and not expected!
    16. PA-05
    17. PA-06
    18. PA-07
    19. PA-17
    20. TX-07
    21. TX-32 We flipped it! :)
    22. VA-02
    23. VA-07 Dave Brat! Bye, bye
    24. VA-10

    Republicans have flipped 2 seats so it's net 22.

  35. [35] 
    Kick wrote:

    Russ
    33

    I am just fuming about my home state of Georgia’s voting problems!

    Republicans don't want people to vote, and as we've discussed many times, there are a myriad of ways to disenfranchise people. It seems like you're facing every one of them.

    How many potential votes were lost because voters did not have four hours of time to wait in order to exercise a right that should not take them ten minutes at most?

    Probably at least half a million.

    The first thing Democrats are going to do in the House:

    1. Trump's tax returns.
    2. Address voting issues.

    Man, I picked the wrong week to stop drinking!

    I'll drink one for you. We flipped TX-32. :)

  36. [36] 
    Kick wrote:

    HOUSE FLIPS
    RED--->BLUE
    23 REQUIRED

    1. AZ-02
    2. CO-06
    3. FL-26
    4. FL-27
    5. IA-01
    6. IL-06
    7. KS-03
    8. MI-11
    9. MN-03
    10. NJ-02
    11. NJ-07
    12. NJ-11
    13. NY-11
    14. NY-19
    15. NY-22
    16. OK-05 Oklahoma!? Insanity!
    17. PA-05
    18. PA-06
    19. PA-07
    20. PA-17
    21. TX-07
    22. TX-32 We flipped it! :)
    23. VA-02
    24. VA-07
    25. VA-10

    Republicans have flipped 2 seats so it's net 23, and that's the ballgame.

    House flips. I'm drinking now... one for Russ too. ;)

  37. [37] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Kick [26] -

    Thanks for that TX district!

    :-)

    As for me, my polling place is around the corner -- I walk to it. And there's never more than 2-3 people in line. CA must have really small precincts or something...

    In any case, yeah, that's how long it took me!

    :-)

    And I agree, buh-bye to Dave Brat...

    ListenWhenYouHear [33] -

    "I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue!"
    -Airplane

    Heh.

    OK, I want to see the House flip, more later...

    -CW

  38. [38] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Oh, and I'd love to see Steve King get beat, too. Meant to say that...

    :-)

    -CW

  39. [39] 
    ListenWhenYouHear wrote:

    First Native American lesbian elected to Congress along with the first TWO Muslim women ... big night for women in this country!

  40. [40] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    LWYH -

    I'm assuming Alexandria Ocasio Cortez won, too, although I haven't checked. Youngest ever! Woo hoo!

    -CW

  41. [41] 
    James T Canuck wrote:

    Alexandria Ocasio Cortez won. That makes my day. Georgia's gubernatorial race is thin, that needs a closer look, the gop have form for slimy shit.

    Seems it went pretty much the way we thought, the happy times for Trump are at an end.

    Time for his heels to be warmed around the beltway...And the Leafs won.

    LL&P

  42. [42] 
    nypoet22 wrote:

    @russ,

    everyone needs to have their camera phones fully charged, so any official (or non-official) who makes up sketchy reasons to try to disenfranchise someone sees national sunlight. sometimes just the act of recording helps.

    JL

  43. [43] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    JTC -

    A friend told me the two words trending on social media tonight were: "Tax returns!"

    Heh. There's that to look forward to...

    :-)

    -CW

  44. [44] 
    Kick wrote:

    Milwaukee Ballots:

    Walker: 7181
    Evers: 38K+

    Holy moly!

    Honey Badger is coming for Scott Walker. :)

  45. [45] 
    nypoet22 wrote:

    iowa 4 and montana, gee whiz. nice job in the rest of iowa though.

  46. [46] 
    James T Canuck wrote:

    CW...Agreed. If that revelation comes to pass, Trump's head will defo go Lampoon Turkey. There's easily two years of exhaustive house committees to look forward to in the run up to 2020. It's long overdue that 'mob-Trump' get their comeuppance. I'm hoping also that this shift in the house gives Mueller the cover he needs to go about his brief. Trump has already said he plans to shuffle his cabinet... so Beauregard is for the bounce as is poor ole Rob.

    Methinks it's going to get messier before the cleaners are dispatched.

    LL&P

  47. [47] 
    Kick wrote:

    Honey Badger don't give a shit. It just takes what it wants!

    Buh bye Scott Walker :P

  48. [48] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    Kick -

    NYTimes, which has been ultra-careful in calling races all evening, just called WI gov. Walker walks. According to 538.com, there were these 50,000 votes from Milwaukee that got overlooked until very late in the evening...

    Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy, that's all I have to say.

    Heh.

    -CW

  49. [49] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    OK, it's time for Seth Meyers to come on... so I'm signing out for the night, folks... time to dream sugar-plum dreams of Speaker Nancy Pelosi...

    Heh.

    -CW

  50. [50] 
    TheStig wrote:

    Waiting until morning is the way to go....especially if you live in the Eastern Time Zone. As of 11pm - when I turned off the TV - only about 150 house races had been called. The news teams were bored and running out of minutia. There is a reason snail racing has never caught on as a spectator sport.

    Things turned out pretty much as the pollsters expected. Polling is not an exact science, but it is not in crisis....or if you prefer, it's always in crisis and that is unlikely to change.

    Flipping the House of Reprobates is a big deal. Trump's life is about to become pure hell. Meaningful House oversight is a bitch. The Federal Prosecutors will be coming back from hiatus. I can see Trump as a one termer. Possibly a one termer in an orange jump suit further down the road.

    No surprises in my own gerrymandered house district. Lost the congressional race, but things went well further down the food chain. Two weekends of stomping around were not in vain.

    CW- another city win for decriminalized pot. By a huge margin!

  51. [51] 
    John M wrote:

    I am very disappointed in Florida. Both Democrats lost by very narrow margins. How we can keep electing Rick Scott is beyond me. He won this time by less than one percentage point of the vote.

    On the bright side though, we have our nation's first elected openly gay governor in Colorado, Jared Polis.

  52. [52] 
    John M wrote:

    Why is Michale not around to eat crow about the House vote?

    GRIN

  53. [53] 
    Kick wrote:

    John Tester leading in Montana now. :)

  54. [54] 
    Kick wrote:

    With the vast remainder of outstanding votes in Missoula County, Tester should end up winning Montana by about ~2.5 percent. :)

  55. [55] 
    Kick wrote:

    Tiny is bragging about winning a Senate seat in the reddest state in America. *laughs*

    Trump is a such a lying con artist. Arguing with cons like Tiny is like playing chess with a pigeon: No matter how bad it loses, the bird is going to shit on the chess board and strut around like it won anyway. :)

  56. [56] 
    James T Canuck wrote:

    The ink wasn't even dry on my last post and Beauregard Sessions is dog meat. I figured Trump would at least wait a day to have at the appearance of the midterms and Jeff's dismissal being coincidental.

    The shiny new Democratic house had best get to work and ensure Trump can't pull the rug out from under Mueller's feet. At this rate, Trump and his Trumpettes will be shredding Mueller's files by Saturday afternoon.

    LL&P

  57. [57] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    John M -

    Just wait until next time in Florida, when 1.5 million more people get the right to vote.

    :-)

    -CW

  58. [58] 
    Chris Weigant wrote:

    New celebratory column is up... check it out...

    :-)

    -CW

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