Prince George was not a good man,
And a lame old duck was he.
On Oval Office afternoons,
No one came round to see.
And, round about November,
Regulations in his queue
Meant as gifts to backers past,
Had missed the deadline at the last,
The end had come so very fast,
And rule of law renewed.

Prince George was not a good man,
Yet had his hopes and fears.
The war he'd launched was endless now
For years and years and years.
But two months before Christmas,
While Americans did shout,
And happy songs of hope were sung
While worldwide, bells readied to be rung,
George stole away upstairs and hung
A bill for fiscal bailing-out.

Prince George was not a good man,
He liked his long vacations;
Alone he planned a new scheme out
While venting his frustrations.
He pushed his team to bargain
And negotiate in true
With Maliki and Talabani,
To divvy up that oil money,
And create from a process quite funny
A legacy for W.

“Please fill my coffers,
And my new library;
I think a tour of speaking
Would surely come in handy;
I don’t mind oil-stock,
And secretive renditions!
And I SHOULD like to leave my staff
In permanent positions.
And, oh! Father Christmas, for my legacy,
Bring me a big, red Iraq war victory!”

Prince George was not a good man —
Riding fiscal crisis out,
He gat him to his ranch again,
There to pace and pout.
Election night he lay there,
Praying hope would lose to fear.
“I think McCain's a-surging now,
(Anxiety bedewed his brow.)
“He’ll win Ohio, anyhow —
Just like I have for years.

“Forget about the coffers,
And forget about libraries;
I’m sure a tour of speaking
Would bore me, by my theory;
I don’t need oil-stock,
I don’t want rendition,
And I HAVE put my loyal staff
In permanent positions.
But, oh! Father Christmas, if I'm to have a legacy,
Bring me a big, red Iraq-war victory!”

Prince George was not a good man —
Next morning when the sun
Rose up to tell a waiting world
Obama had it won,
And people seized each other,
And laughed and danced with glee,
For hope had many hearts endeared,
Change more potent than vile smears,
Prince George said grimly: “As I feared,
Nothing for my legacy!”

“I did want coffers,
And a big library;
I know a tour of speaking
Would've come in handy;
I do love oil-stock,
I did love rendition.
I haven’t got a loyal staff —
In any old position.
And, oh! if Father Christmas cared for my legacy,
He would have brought Iraq war victory!”

Prince George stood by the window,
And there did glumly meet
The happy crowds of boys and girls
Celebrating in the street.
A while he stood there watching,
And envying them still...
When through the window big and red
There hurtled by his royal head,
And bounced and fell upon the bed,
The Iraqi SOFA bill!

AND OH, FATHER CHRISTMAS,
YOU'VE ENDED OUR BEREAVEMENT...
BY WRINGING AT LAST,
FROM OUT OF GEORGE:
A STATUS OF FORCES
AGREEMENT!